"The sign brings customers."

Jean de La Fontaine (1621 - 1695)

"The final mystery is oneself."

Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)

"I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders."

Jewish Proverb

"There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails."

Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)

"If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and saw the guy was reading a magazine."

Jack Handy (1949 - Present)

"Life's enchanted cup sparkles near the brim."

Lord Byron (1788 - 1824)

"The path is smooth that leadeth on to danger."

William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616)

"You can't trust water:  even a straight stick turns crooked in it."

W.C. Fields (1880 - 1946)